Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Illinois, night time stress and emotionally amazing

So much for regularly updating this thing. Well, it has been a busy month. We spent two weeks in October in Illinois visiting all my family. It was the first time Oliver met them. You see, Illinois is like a vacuum and it sucks people in to where they rarely or never leave. Only few escape. So my family has yet to see where we live in the Northwest. And that’s why they had never met Oliver. It was a very precious 2 weeks though. I felt like a piece of my puzzle finally fit. The family knows how wonderful he really is.

He’s walking now, for those who don’t know. And running. It’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. He just now found me hiding in this dark room with the computer and is begging for my attention in just his diaper and a big grin. So this may or may not get posted tonight. I love to watch him toddle around. Now he’s on my lap captivated by the glow of the screen.

I’d say that motherhood is not necessarily less demanding these days...although Oliver easily entertains himself. The hardest part right now is night time. He’s waking up several times crying and since I’m weaning him from nursing at night, it makes it even more stressful. Last night he woke up about 5 or 6 times. But it could be that his 3 tooth (top left) is poking through. Poor guy. (....poor me!)

I think it’s amazing how close we’ve become. Although he is not as physically dependent as a newborn...he needs me emotionally right now. And that makes me feel AWESOME. In fact, I’m probably a lot more capable of meeting someone’s emotional needs than I am with the physical. I just feel like I’m likely to make a lot more mistakes....like not feed him enough, or teach him the wrong disciplines and methods of sleeping or socializing. But I’m totally amazing at being the one who understands or encourages or empathizes. You probably wouldn’t want to be stuck on a deserted island with someone like me. Unlesss, of course, you would rather talk than eat or survive. Then pick me. But I am a good helper. If you know what to do on the island to survive...I would do anything to back you up and keep you going. Haha....anywaaaayy. Way off subject.

3 comments:

Amanda said...

haha... I would much rather talk than eat or survive. :) I'll take you on my island any day. ;)

Steph Smith said...

Dear Jessica Blog Updates,

New York misses you.

stlouisloonybin said...

Jessica,
I don't think it's Illinois as whole that makes people say "Ya know what? This place is so gret, I'm NEVER LEAVING. EVER." I think it's just southern Illinois. You grow up there, you are made to believe that the cities (and even "big towns" like Carbondale with a whopping 20,000 people) are terrible, and that you would never want to live there. Why would you want to leave Benton, it's such a "nice" small town? (it begs the question...what is a "nice" small town?) Southern Illinois is the black hole, not Illinois as whole ;)

Fortunately I got out, and it took forever for my mom to adjust...and that's only 100 miles away (in St Louis city, not the Illinois burbs that southern Illinoisans usually move to if they move to "St. Louis"), I couldn't imagine moving across the country, she'd have died!

Joey Toms