Thursday, January 21, 2010

Skating for Vancouver

We got free tickets to US Figure Skating Championships here in Spokane. This competition determins who will be placed on the US team for the Olympics in Vancouver. Novice Dance Finals was the event we went to. Pretty impressive and very creative. When I called to tell my mother she said she read in my late Grandma Olive Gregory’s journal that she LOVED figure skating and used to do it when she was younger. I never knew that! I wish I could have told her about our experience.

Photo numbers 3-6 were my favorite performances. Photos 1 & 2 won the competition. I wish I could have seen Sasha Cohen perform. She’s a name I actually recognize from the days I used to watch skating on television.

It was something I've never experienced live before and may never again. Makes me want to start dancing again. Not sure my 25-year-old joints could handle it anymore. Sad how 25 is old if you haven't danced in 4-5 years and want to start again. Doesn't seem right.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Love > Happiness

I hate feeling low or sad or unmotivated. Waves of these feelings occasionally come over me and I often cannot figure out why or where they came from. It seems so out of nowhere and I think to myself, “I have no reason whatsoever to feel like this.” It used to really bother me that this would happen because I can’t pinpoint a cause or prevent it from happening. Then thoughts of  “am I depressed? do I need help? what’s wrong with me?” annoy the heck out of me and only make it worse. Well, I just had another one of those moments and then I miraculously had a thought that was really helpful to the moment and will be in the future if I don’t forget it.

“So what if you don’t feel on top of the world right now. That’s more than okay. In fact, it’s healthy.”

Oh…well, thanks. I can move on now. That was easy.

I like my feelings. Even the ones that aren’t enjoyable. They are true to life and are a part of what keeps me sane actually. And even if society and the media make us think life is about being happy…it’s not. In fact that is a huge lie that I wish I could erase from this earth. Life is not about happiness. Life is bigger than that, and this past year I have had a chance to really see what is more than happiness. Love. Sacrifice. Jesus even said “For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.” The greatest man to walk the earth did not live for happiness. That’s awesome. And the reason we receive so much joy from putting the lives of others before our own is because it’s right. Because it is more important and critical than happiness itself. So I’m putting happiness on a shelf and letting it happen when it happens. I’m not going to reach for it. It exists and sometimes it doesn’t. I have more important and meaningful things to pour myself into. Happy  Best New Year.