Saturday, December 25, 2010

My 3 year old

Oliver is 3 now. He's so big! And so little.

Three is the age I started to retain memories of life.
My dad says he remembers his kids most when we were two and three.
There's a sweet innocence and an excitement for life and learning.
People say that time flies and your kids are grown before you know it. But I don't exactly feel like these last few years have flown by. Instead I feel like Oliver has always been a part of my life. My life before him is so distant and seems decades ago. The girl I was before him seems so vastly different. My emotions, my motives, my strongest desires have changed.

One thing I realized this past week is that I used to think I knew what intense emotion was. I used to think I knew what it was like to experience love and attachment to its fullest. But I had NO IDEA the intensity of emotion and love I would experience when becoming a parent. It's the kind of intensity you can die from. That's how it feels. It's amazing. And it started with Oliver 3 years ago. My existence will never be the same.

I'm yours forever, Oliver.

2 comments:

Ali Shea said...

I know EXACTLY how you feel!!! Life before doesn't seem real! Going somewhere without packing up a child with me or coming home to an childless home sounds so boring to me now! I'm glad we both became mommies and both know how it feels!! our love is never ending!

vickie said...

I so love your 3 year old, Oliver. He has a deep soul and will someday have insight that goes beyond his years. I sense eternal connection when I think of him. I am so glad you know of this fathomless love of parenthood.